"Give me all your sadness. I'll throw it away!" said Sid

It was time for all the preschoolers to go home. But Pari was just not in the mood to go get her bag. She had tears in her eyes instead. 

Pari: I am upset. 
"What happened Pari?"
Pari: Kar is not my best friend anymore. 

And she starts crying. 
Kar walks by, we call him and he comes in with his bag and hat, all set to go home. 

"Pari called me Bad Kar!"

Pari looks at him, keeps crying, expecting him to apologize. But he doesn't. 

"You called him bad? Why?"

Pari continues to look away. With tears rolling down cheeks, she says," He's not my friend anymore."

"But you called him bad. Can you talk to him please?"

Pari doesn't budge. She stops crying, folds her hands and turns away instead. 

"What do we do Kar? She doesn't want to talk about this. "

Kar: We should resolve this. 

"How do you think?"

Silence. 

Ath and Sid were watching this entire episode at the back, walk to Pari. Sid holds her shoulder and says, " Don't worry Pari. I'll be your best friend. I'll take care of you."
He holds out his hand, Ath follows the same, "Give me all your sadness. I'll throw it away!"

Pari took out all her sadness one by one which they threw out of the window. 

Seeing such kindness emanate from this four year old was really heart- warming. 

Unfortunately, the situation was not resolved. 

"Pari and Kar, can you please talk to each other?"

Pari:" I am upset."
Kar:" I was also upset when you said that."

That was the end of their discussion. Upon hearing that the words she chose to say to Kar had made him upset too, she quit. She turned around and walked away. It was also time for her to leave as the van was waiting to leave for the drop. Kar looked lost and unresolved. We talked about resolving it on Monday when we meet again and parted for the day. 

Monday arrived and they came back together to talk about it. 

Kar:" She called me a bad boy."
Pari, with her hands folded and face angry:" He came and closed it!"
Kar: "I was making door"

"Door for what?"
Kar:" Car. They were making a car!"

"Oh! Pari , he was helping you make a door for your car!"

Pari's face broke out into a smile, "Oh..."

The whole mood of the situation elevated into pleasant smiles. 

"Kar, but if you want the play with somebody, don't you think you should ask them and then do the necessary things?"

Kar nodded a yes. 

"Pari, next time you don't like something, you can always tell them what it is that you don't like about what they are doing, instead of calling them a bad boy or girl."

Pari, still smiling also nods a yes. And they walked back to class in harmony. Pari pulled Kar's cheek to show affection and happily went back to play. 

The situation stayed with them for more than 2 whole days, unresolved. It was necessary to get them together and resolve their issue. Even if as adults we perceive these issues as 'little', it could be a great deal of distress for them, and is necessary that these loops get closed. It sure is beautiful how a lot of emotions got processed and conveyed throughout this little episode, from anger, hurt, compassion and kindness, calmness, etc. Children are capable of so much more than we realize and it is important to keep an open mind when we are with them. It all makes it worth the while in the end.


Contributed by Sruthy Krishna, Learning Facilitator at Sparkling Mindz Global Preschool.