What would you do if you ever felt like you weren't part of a group, that you had no friends, that you felt like nobody liked you? 

How would you feel? 

Moreover, how do you think a child feels when she feels like she has no friends, that she isall alone, that nobody likes her?

Our 4 year old K had been finding it difficult to connect and be friends with her classmates, feeling alone and sad but not sure how to solve it by herself; neither did she have clarity on why and what she was feeling. 

The time came then for our 4 year olds to get a new set of library books to take and read at home. Out of those books, was one tiny treasure called 'Something  Else' by Kathryn Cave and Chris Riddell. The book is about a little creature the other animals call 'Something Else' because it doesn't look like the others. The storyline moves through the emotions faced by the creature when it felt alone, sad, lonely because of how others treated it and called it 'Something Else'. The book however ends on a happy note where another creature that looks like none other comes into the picture and they become the best of friends. 


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Call it luck, call it a connection, K found it and took it home for the week. Days pass by, the book made its rounds with the others without any of us realizing how deep a connection K had made with the creature in the book called 'Something Else', until it was brought to our attention by her mother. K had been feeling like she was Something Else in the class as she felt alone, lonely and sad. Reading that book gave her the vocabulary and understanding of her emotions and feelings that she connected to, resulting in her opening up about it to her parents. 

When it was brought to the attention of the school, we decided to dive right in, as we always do. With her in particular, we have been working on communication skills, and as a class, social skills and making friends with new children were on the focus. Because of the initial layer of work that was already done, when K's emotions were brought in the picture, children found it easier to empathize and suggest solutions.

We read the book today, it being a Thursday where we usually read a book for our Library Routine. We chose 'Something Else' to read and everybody was excited and jumping on their mats, except for K. She looked quiet and withdrawn throughout. However, we proceeded. Children kept empathizing with the character and vocalizing about the scenes in the book. Post the reading session, the floor was open for questions and further discussions. 

"Have you ever felt like how 'Something Else' was feeling? " 

Nobody answered as such. 

The question then was repeated to K to which she whispered a yes. She then came and stood with us in the front for the issue to be discussed further. We held her throughout to let her know that she was safe in our circle. 

"Because I am alone like Something Else. Nobody is not playing with me." meaning to say that nobody played with her.

The whole class of the 4-year olds sat quiet and looked concerned as she spoke as they now knew exactly how she felt. 

"We will be friends with you. " 
"We will play with you." 
"I will write a letter for you at my home. I will bring it for you. You can take it home."
"I will play with you K"...

And on and on went children, soothing her heart. 

There was no need of further conversations and this culminated in a a gentle group hug where they just held her. And T planted her a kiss in the end. ​

Developing a vocabulary to express how they are feeling is a good first step to seeking help when someone is feeling left out, lonely or upset. Children, when not felt supported and loved, can develop all kinds of insecurities right from childhood that could take a long time to move out of. As important as it is to make them feel loved, supported and belonged, it's also important equip them to love, support and be there for one another. 


Contributed by Sruthy Krishna, Learning Facilitator at Sparkling Mindz Global Preschool.

At SM, the facilitators have something called an Inspirational Standup (ISU) every morning right before the classes commence. The purpose is to get inspired for the day, perhaps, even for life, and to find deeper connections and purposes in what we do. ISU usually includes reading a write up, watching a video, listening to a poem, playing a game, learning a new dance as a team, and such. The possibilities are endless when it comes to creating a new ISU. 

As we sat today in the front space of the school thinking about what we could do for the day's ISU, we agreed to observe the three children who were playing in the mirror cave, completely engaged in their little game, and ponder on the emotions they could be feeling. We agreed on 5 minutes to observe, then discuss after. The purpose for this exercise was to make stepping into the shoes of another and empathize deeper, consciously. 

We chose this exercise today as we had sat for a training session yesterday and discussed on the importance of empathizing with another to solve problems deeper and create more awareness within ourselves about another person's thought patterns. So what better way to practice what we preach at SM about depth, vulnerability, connectedness...than to take perspectives?!

As the minutes progressed, we stopped after what seemed like 2 minutes to share our experiences. What came out was deeper than what we planned for!

Facilitator 1: I saw them experiencing curiosity, happiness, calmness, joy, sense of trust, sense of brotherhood and a family bonding, feeling at home, love. 
Facilitator 2 and 3 were smiling ear to ear at this point, realizing almost all of their observations were covered too. 
Facilitator 2 added, "Yes! I also noticed awkwardness from Ved when he noticed that we were watching them." 

The discussion went on for another minute or so, adding more layers to what we thought they were experiencing during those moments when were observing them. This is when we realized that a simple exercise like this added so much more value to our day as we consciously stepped in and out of children's shoes to understand how they felt and what we could do to help them move forward. Not just children, even stepping in other people's shoes help us move forward from stuck moments that involve them. 

We also realized how we don't need to search far and wide for inspiration; it's just around the corner! All it takes is to be mindful for a minute and look around with an open and non- judgemental mind. And the world is all ours to grab!

Contributed by Sruthy Krishna, Learning Facilitator at Sparkling Mindz Global Preschool.

​I was having a conversation with children today on putting effort and how it's not easy, yet we do it. We reflected on it during our facilitators meeting. It inspired me to write a poem. Sharing...

Everyday 
I choose a fight
With my time
On what's right 

I choose to grow 
I choose the pain
I choose the joy
From deep within 

Everyday 
I choose to talk
With care
And deep thought

I choose to grow 
I choose the pain
I choose the joy
From deep within 

Everyday 
I choose to work
To make an impact 
For what it's worth

I choose to grow 
I choose the pain
I choose the joy
From deep within 

Most times I win
Even when I don't
I still choose the fight
As it's worth my might

If our children saw everyday as a challenge to grow and make themselves better. If they just started to see themselves as worthy of great things we would see them pushing themselves and picking battles that are worthy of everyone's time. 

Contributed by Sreeja Iyer, Founder, Sparkling Mindz Global School and Preschool

The day for the 3 to 4 year olds had just begun where they all sat down after the Welcome Song. Since the new academic year has just been kick started, they were all pondering on the new things they were about to learn this year, things that they remember from last year, etc. 
They are currently in Cubs (3-4 years). The hierarchy at SM goes like this, 
Guppies, Pups, Calves, Cubs, Joeys, Dolphins, Leopards, Falcons and Unicorns (from 1.5 year olds to 18year olds) and An seemed curious. 

An: What is after Joeys, ma'am?
Facilitator (F): Dolphins. 
An: And then?
F: Then we have Leopards, Falcons and Unicorns.
Av: They are all animal names. 
F: Yes, absolutely!
An, not having registered Av's comment continues: It will take us a long time to get there. 
F: Yeah, a few years. Which is awesome because you will get to learn so much and have so much fun doing it too!!
An, looking like she's given up: Ahh, so tiring ma'am. We'll be so tired by then. 
F: What do you mean?
An: School is so boring ma'am. All these letters and numbers and activities. I don't want to come. 
F: Why do you feel like that? Because the An that I know loves to come and learn things. 
An (nodding a clear no): No I don't. I don't want to learn any of these. They are boring. I get so tired. It's so tiring. 

An has been visibly quite off since the morning, so the Facilitator asked her a couple more questions, which seemed to just go in the loops of 'tiring' and 'boring' and an overall 'quitting' mode. 

F: Are you really bored and tired, or are you just having a bad day?
An (suddenly sitting up, giving it a second to think, seemingly more clear in her thoughts now): I'm just having a bad day. 
F: What happened?
An: I didn't sleep well. I woke up to drink water. 

Then she was taken through the loops she had created in her head which connected school and her overall energy for that day, and given more clarity which she then agreed to that they were two separate things after all.
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F: So you're saying you didn't sleep well and woke up at night and you're tired because of that?
An nods in agreement.
F: Does it still mean that you consider school boring and tiring? And you don't like the activities?
An: No I think I am just tired today. 
F: okay. See you just mixed it here. You were feeling tired because you didn't sleep well and you thought you didn't like school because of how tired you felt. See these two are not connected. 
An nodding in agreement: Yeah. 

She seemed to have resolved that little loop she had created and the rest of the day went by smooth for her and her energy seemed high too. 

It's important to help children see perspective and let them talk and figure things out for themselves without jumping in and resolving things immediately. Understanding their thought patterns and going deeper is essential to resolve conflicts and move ahead. What happened with this 4 year old was an important lesson for the child and the rest of the children who were listening to this conversation because it helped them see perspective and probably resolve things quicker later. 


Contributed by Sruthy Krishna, Learning Facilitator at Sparkling Mindz Global Preschool.

​During a story reading session with 5 year olds, children were feeling hot and wanted to turn on the fan. Ar and Av get up from their chair and run towards the switchboard at the same time. Av reaches first and turns on the fan and as an instant reaction Ar hits him.
 
(Facilitator (F) observing the scene calls out for them)
 
Av: Ma'am Ar hit me, he always hits me.
F(to the class): Do you all think Ar gets angry and hits people for no reason?
Class: No ma'am. 
Ar (angrily): I get angry when people don't let me do what I want to do.
F: I understand you get angry but, is it helpful to hit or hurt someone when you are angry?
Ar: Yes 
F (to the class): Do you all think hitting when angry is a good thing?
Class: No ma'am. 
T: Ar should talk to them.
F: Thank you T, do we all want to help Ar calm down when he is angry? 
Class: Yes ma'am.
F (to Ar): How do you want everyone to help you calm down?
Ar: By not talking.
F (To the class): So, can we all agree to not talk to Ar when he is angry, he'll calm himself down and then join us.
Class: Yes ma'am.
F (to Av): Why do you think Ar hit you?
Av: Because I saw Ar run and I ran before him and turned on the fan.
F: What do you think you could have done instead?
Av: Let him (switch) on the fan, next time I will get a chance.
F (to Ar): What do you think you could have done?
Ar: Ask him.
F: So, do we all agree to use our words next time we don't like something?
Class: Yes ma'am.
 
Be it a child or an adult, helping them become aware of their own emotions and learning to express them in resourceful manner is a very important skill to learn for life. When children start this early, it helps them empathize with themselves and figure out mechanisms to understand, accept and cope with their emotions better, building emotionally resilient adults of the future. 

Contributed by Yashika Ganesh, Learning Facilitator, Sparkling Mindz Global Preschool and edited by Sreeja Iyer, CEO, Sparkling Mindz.
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#sparklingmindzglobalschool
#inspiringconfidentlearners
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#everychildcanempathize

​Empathy is, at its simplest, awareness of the feelings and emotions of other people. It is a key element of Emotional Intelligence, the link between self and others, because it is how we as individuals understand what others are experiencing as if we were feeling it ourselves. An example of empathy from a four year olds class. It was ship time with kitchen set. Each one started pretending to cook their favorite dish. Just then each child picked up a character.

Aliyah: I’m mamma
Veer (jumped in): Then I’m the papa
Amogh (volunteered): I can be the brother
Saanvi (did not pick a character, looked at Neel): Neel is the baby
Neel (disagreed vehemently): I’m not a baby
Amogh (explained patiently): But you’re so little, Neel
Neel (not really convinced): *quiet*
Saanvi (noticing Neel's reluctant face, empathized): Neel it’s just a pretend okay
Neel (now content, agreed): Okay
 
It is clearly visible how Saanvi put herself in Neel’s shoes, understood his emotional state and responded appropriately to it. it is only when we feel fully understood do we get convinced, else it takes a lot to accommodate everyone to truly collaborate and work together. When children learn such lessons early on in life, empathy becomes a skill they can practice and carry on with themselves for the rest of their lives. 

Contributed by Grace Veronica, Facilitator, Sparkling Mindz Global Preschool

It was around 9:30am in the morning and we only had daycare functioning that day. I had decided to drop by and say hi to the children. Only Ad, a 5 year old, had arrived by then. I went in to see him playing with a set of kitchen toys. He was really happy to see me and I decided to strike up a conversation.

He talked a little about how much he enjoyed the Annual day (which had just got over), how happy he was to see his Mommy in the audience and also about a step that he had forgotten in the dance. All of a sudden his eyes lit up as he said,

Ad: Ma'am, I'm so excited! My Papa is coming today.
Me: Oh wow! Is it? 
Ad: Yes, he'll come in the night when I'll be sleeping and I'm not coming to school tomorrow.
Me: So you are going to spend the day with your Papa?
Ad: Yes, he's my best best best friend at home! He plays catch-catch with me. We play so much!
Me: That's awesome, where had he been?
Ad: He went to the US, I used to think he doesn't love me and he went away.
Me: Really! What do you think now?
Ad: I think, he goes just for work. But I don't like it when he goes. I think he'll not go again. 

Those lines got me thinking about how children interpret their parents' absence in their lives, even for a short while. It all directly translates to  - they don't love me or I'm not good enough!

In our culture, we often don't see a need to involve children, especially this young, in our decisions, which often leaves them feeling left out or insecure. When we trust them to understand and also acknowledge their feelings, we can start to have a meaningful and respectful conversation with them about how they feel and what can be done about situations that are sometimes beyond our control. We can also talk to them about priorities and they learn to negotiate the real world, understand what matters to you and not just themselves and so on....in short, it helps them to learn and grow as individuals who in future have to navigate these decisions and emotions on their own.

It is extremely important to have conversations and set expectations with children regarding the changes they are going to deal with, this will equip them to cope with it with much ease, without disrupting their emotions. Even if they don't agree, it's still important to talk and discuss as it will help build the bond of trust between the parent and the child. Trust me, they eventually do understand! 

Coming back to Ad, the transformation in this child was amazing to see. The same child who would cry and be upset for days every time his dad left, was showing such a deep level of trust and understanding with his parents. As a school, modeling trust-based conversations and interactions with a child for parents is an important aspect of the relationship we develop with each parent and child. It has helped Ad transform and so have several other children and parents. Experiencing the bliss of close connect, trust and empathetic connect with your child is unparalleled and seeing your child grow with these values is icing on the cake for the parent!

Contributed by Yashika CG, Asst. Learning Facilitator at Sparkling Mindz.

The 3 year olds class is having snacks, it's around 10.30am. The children have a place where they usually keep their water bottles to pick up during the day in the class. Ab is drinking water from his water bottle at the table and keeps it on the table itself. Av takes Ab's water bottle from the table, very graciously returns it to the window. Ab, confused by his bottle being moved tries to take it back, perhaps he was not done yet. Av just continues to move it further on the window where everyone's bottle was kept as if telling Ab, "this is where it should go". Unable to understand Av's intentions and thoroughly frustrated by now, Ab gets upset and starts crying. Maybe, Ab didn't like the intrusion into how and where he kept his water bottle and Av was more concerned about returning things to their rightful place.

F: Why don't you talk to Ab about what he is doing and that you are not liking it?

This didn't work. Ab did not stop crying and no amount of conversation seemed to be helping. Av struggled to see the impact of his behavior on Ab and Ab struggled to see the positive intention behind Av's action.

An who was sitting and watching all of this, seemed to have sensed and understood Ab's discomfort. She takes the water bottle from the window and gives it to Ab letting him have it back on the table.

She is not done yet; she runs to get a tissue and hands one over to Ab to console him too!

In this scenario, what An did was extraordinary where she showed an incredible amount of empathy to understand both the emotion and the intention. An took the initiative to solve the problem too and go over and above to show care. Ab was not communicating much yet, hence, An's efforts and thinking on the feet seemed even more exceptional.

Many a times, children seem to mimic a caring behavior from home. But thinking on your feet to solve a classmate's problem needs empathy in good measure.

When we as facilitators and responsible adults who work with children learn to observe these nuances, cultivate and nurture them is when we create an empathetic generation.


Contributed by Sruthy Krishna, Learning Facilitator at Sparkling Mindz Global Preschool.

Our 3 year olds were exploring emotions and they began to connect emotions to nature. Is Sun happy or sad to play with clouds? Do clouds cover the Sun in anger? What about rainbow - is that a happy sign? Are moon and sun friends? The wonder never ceases in their world, nor do their connections....a sample conversation is shared below.

Ab (smiling at the facilitator): The sun is happy ma'am.
F: Why is the sun happy?
T: Because the sun is behind a tree and it is happy.
An: No it is sad. Because the clouds come in front of him. They are all angry clouds.
F: Why are they angry?
H: Because they are dark. Rain is coming.
An: Yeah, the sun is angry because there are so many clouds in front of the sun and it is hiding.
<Everybody goes into a pensive mood>
F: Ok. Looks like we have interesting things to think and wonder about. How about we all go upstairs and wonder at the sun and other things that are up there? We can even wonder which emotion the sun and the clouds are having. Would you like that?
S, T, An, Aa, Ab, H: Yes ma'am. 
F: Ok. Let's put a sticky note here and write it down. This week let's find some time and go upstairs to look!

Emotions of the sun, sky, clouds:
The children were taken upstairs to watch the sky and wonder about the various emotions they might be feeling.
Aa: I can see the sky
K: I see the sun ma'am
Ab: Ma'am , I can see the clouds
F: Very nice! How do you think the sun is feeling?
Collectively: Happy
Av: Because he is out today and he is not sick
<Collectively spot clouds>
F: How do you think the clouds are feeling today?
H & K: Happy, good.
H (changing her mind in an instant): I don't know.
F: Where is the moon then?
H: No, it's too far we cannot see it.
Av: No, the moon and the stars will come only in the night
F: Why?
Av: Because I saw a book like that in the office yesterday
They all came around, sat in a circle to watch the sky.
H: I see sky and sun
S: Sun is sick ma'am
F: Why?
An (consoling S as he is getting upset): No see, the sun is feeling so happy. He is on us.
Av (adding some love and care): Because see he won't get sick today.

As children explore emotions through nature and make connections they generally tend to project how they feel, learn to express it, work with each other's emotions, respond to it and even present other perspectives for the same situation - building emotional range and flexibility. 

Children represented in visual form the feelings they felt during the sky watch. It is generally very illustrative to watch them represent their feelings through colours and motion. 

The emotions came pouring onto paper through strokes and colours and left indelible marks on their minds. We continue this discussion on emotions on another day, with another set of natural elements...wondering what they will pour next, connect next?



Contributed by Sruthy Krishna, Learning Facilitator at Sparkling Mindz Global Preschool.

We believe that when children connect, learn and grow with the nature around them the experience and the learning outcomes they get are very, very different.  It also stays with them forever. In order to attain this we take children for a lot of visits that help them connect to nature better.

 One such visit was to the park nearby and Anika, Aliyah, Zohar and Het were in one such group that went to explore the park. As we started from our school we came across a tree which had a hole in it. Upon seeing it Zohar said, “Ma’am caterpillar lives in it” and to this Anika added her perspective she said, “I can see many ants in it they have made a big hole and they are living in it”. Aliyah said, “The spiders also make their home like this and they make sure that no one comes in”. (Children are beginning to relate to the need of basic shelter and what purpose it serves in the lives of different living things.)

 Then as we started moving further we saw another tree which was bent and upon seeing that Anika said, “The rain came and splashed a lot of water on the tree that has made the tree to bend”. She also connected the bend with the mountain and said that it also looked like a mountain. (Explaining and understanding causality for natural phenomena is the beginning of scientific inquiry in a child and visualizing and connecting the shape to things not present in the immediate surroundings displays the child’s ability to make creative connections)

 Zohar touched the tree with his little finger and said it is too rough. (Beautifully connecting his learning back in class to the real life and using the right kind of vocabulary to describe it)

 As we moved forward they started to speak about the rain. Hearing the conversation the facilitator asked the children, “Where does the rain come from?” to which Anika said, “It comes from the plants.” The other children were observing the trees around them. Zohar who saw a coconut tree near a house said, “Coconuts”. On hearing this Aliyah connected her previous trip and said “Yes, when I came with Priya Ma’am we saw a coconut which was on the road it had an oval hole in it.” (It is amazing what children remember and take away in trips and the amount of detail they tend to process when they are totally involved in a learning journey.)

 We continued to walk and as the children walked they made sure they did not stamp on the leaves when asked why they were walking carefully, Aliyah said “They will get hurt if we stamp them”.

 As we continued our journey we saw a tree which was cut down and the leaves had turned brown, seeing that a conversation erupted between three of them.

Anika: Someone has cut it down
Aliyah: Yes, Anika that is why the leaves have turned brown and they are sad
Het: “No, no they are crying”.

 Connecting to and learning through nature helps children to look at learning in different and more meaningful ways. It also enables them to apply their learning practically and develop deeper empathy for their surroundings.

 Finally, as we reached the park. Anika saw big stones which looked like pumpkin on the ground and said, “I can see pumpkins on the ground.”  Then we came across a big white tree Zohar said, “Ma’am the branches are also white in colour” the children were asked why this tree alone looks white and Anika responded saying, “Someone took a big scissor and they have cut the brown part away”. While returning to our school Zohar saw a lot of leaves which were fallen down and said, “Oh, no Ma’am look there someone shook the tree and all the flowers have fallen down”. It was a sad moment for all of them when they realized that loss and change are such an integral part of Mother Nature.

 Children tend to look at the nature around them and extend metaphors from their lives and how they feel onto nature. Every trip we make is an experience for us and children to look at the world with a new pair of eyes and see what others might have missed and to feel what only we can feel for who we are!


Contributed by Sujitha M, Learning & Innovation Engineer at Sparkling Mindz